Monday, March 8, 2010

Exodus - Ten Plagues, Ten Commandments, Ten Hours of my life I wish I had back

I would love to do this post about how different Exodus is from the 1956 film "The Ten Commandments" but I haven't seen that movie since I was a kid so instead you can read about it for yourself here on Wikipedia.

Instead, I'll just do the usual and run through some stuff that I thought was funny, confusing, and/or disturbing.

EX 3:14 Popeye was stealing from God. Who knew?

EX 4:2, EX 14:15 I still don't get why an all-knowing being needs to ask questions. Dramatic effect?

EX 4:21, EX 7:3, EX 9:12, EX 10:1, EX 10:20, EX 10:27, EX 11:10, EX 14:4, EX 14:8 This was the hardest part of the Exodus for me to get past. God tells Moses to go to Pharaoh and ask Pharaoh to let his people go. But Pharaoh is a jerk and doesn't do it so God unleashes 10 plagues on Egypt, killing people in the process. In between each plague God has Moses ask Pharaoh again to just let his people go but Pharaoh never gives in. However, what these verses are suggesting (flat out saying?) is that God purposely made Pharaoh turn down Moses' requests. That seems a tad unfair. Granted, there are other verses that word it as though Pharaoh is hardening his own heart (EX 8:15, EX 8:32, EX 9:34) but the emphasis is on God being the force behind Pharaoh's heart hardening(?). I'm sure there's an explanation given for this but I don't know what it is. Perhaps someone could enlighten me.

EX 14:17 God does the same thing to the regular Egyptians, practically forcing them into the Red Sea himself.

EX 9:23-24 Is the "fire" in this verse supposed to be lightning or actual fire? It seems to me like they just thought lightning was fire "running down to the earth," which is an understandable thought for a relatively primitive culture. Except that later (EX 19:16) they refer to lightning as lightning.

EX 12:12 This is, to me, the most unmistakable example of henotheism so far. Why would God say he is going to execute judgement on the gods of Egypt if they don't exist? That's like saying you are totally gonna beat down some leprechauns.

EX 12:48 Wow! That's a lot to go through just to keep the Passover. I'd probably say something like, "No. That's ok. I don't like lamb anyway. I'm allergic."

EX 15 This has got to be the worst lyrics ever.

EX 16:14 Errrr....what?

EX 18:11 Some more henotheism. Notice that's it not "now I know that the Lord is the only god."

EX 18:21-22 "And the Lord created Middle-Management."

EX 19:16-18 Is it just me or is Mount Sinai a volcano?

EX 22:16 Here, virgin can also mean "a girl of marriageable age." Why does that not carry over to the NT? Or does it?

Most of the laws talked about in here I can understand as what was necessary at the time before modern courts and whatnot were established, but what's up with the young goat thing?

EX 24:8 Gross! I wonder if anyone was thinking, "You couldn't have just shown it to us!?!?"

What is up with the ridiculous detail about how to build all these various things and how to consecrate priests like they're Carrie? I'm not going to link to it, just take my word for it. It's crazy descriptive so there must be a reason for it to be in there. Someone help me out here.

EX 31:14 That just seems excessive. What if something really needed to get done?

EX 32:11-14 This was really weird to me. Moses asks God to lay off his people a little and not smite them for creating a golden calf. So naturally Moses turns around and orders the sinners killed. EX 32:27-28 Yeah. That makes sense.

EX 34:10-28 I couldn't pass this up even though I was already aware of it. Are these the real Ten Commandments or no? I've heard both sides argued and I'm still not sure. I mean, I get why the Ten Commandments that we know are the preferable ones, but the wording in these verses makes it seem like this was where God really wanted us to focus our energy.

So that's it. I've heard it said that there's no real evidence Moses ever existed or that the Hebrews spent 40 years in the desert or even that they were ever in Egypt. But, I'll accept that the story is fairly true in that there was probably a leader of the Hebrews at one point early on named Moses. All the supernatural/plague stuff though just sounds like either Moses was lying to his people (like how North Koreans think Kim Jong Il was the first man to land on the moon) or his people embellished or flat-out made things up about his life (like how we think George Washington chopped down a cherry tree and threw a coin across a river).

Anyway, up next is Leviticus. I'm sure I'll have a LOT of interesting things to say about that book! Stay tuned!

-Nikko

7 comments:

  1. What you've hit onto with that part about the pharaoh, I think, is one of the most troubling aspects of Christian mythology overall -- that God seems to enjoy setting up people to fail (see: Judas, Lucifer). If this is indeed true (and I think there's a lot of textual evidence that it IS) it not only takes a serious bite out of free will, but it makes God fairly cruel.

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  2. To answer two of your questions. First, with God remembering. It is not an all-knowing being asking questions because He lacks knowledge nor is it for dramatic effect. Rather, such inclusions are God's way of reminding the reader of His promises - given all of Scripture is inspired by God.

    Secondly with Pharaoh. Yes, that is what you are reading. God hardens Pharaoh's heart. Now, this has to be understood in the context that God is eternal and separate from time. God does not harden a heart that would be soft and tender to coming to Him. God allowed his heart to be hardened because Pharaoh rejected Him and God knew he would never come to Him, and this maximized God's glory through it.

    Given we are talking about God, for God to want His glory is what God must seek because to be God means there is nothing greater. Everything in Scripture from Genesis to Revelation goes back to Jesus, the cross, and God's glory. It's all for Him.

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  3. "such inclusions are God's way of reminding the reader of His promises"

    Can you elaborate on that?

    "God allowed his heart to be hardened because Pharaoh rejected Him and God knew he would never come to Him, and this maximized God's glory through it."

    Maybe I missed the verse that said that. Or is it in a later book? Could you let me know what verse that's from?

    "Given we are talking about God, for God to want His glory is what God must seek because to be God means there is nothing greater."

    .......what?

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  4. God reminds the reader of a promise He made previously. And "God remembered" reminds the reader, God made this promise previously and is holding Himself faithful to what He said He would do earlier.

    Romans 9 is where you will find the passage referring to God hardening Pharaoh's heart and that through it, God's glory was made known.

    To be God means there is no one greater. I just inserted that because often the response to that is God's an egomaniac, so I just threw that in prior to any thoughts arising stating that to be God means there is no one greater so for Him to want to be glorified and to make His glory known is in and of itself to be God. For Him to not want His glory to be made known and for Him not to work human history to accomplish His purposes and maximize His glory is for Him to say He alone does not deserve it; He alone is not the greatest. That's all that was referring to.

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  5. That doesn't explain questions like "Where are you?" (GE 3:9), "Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten of the tree of which I commanded you not to eat?" (GE 3:11), "What is this that you have done?" (GE 3:13), "Why are you angry, and why has your face fallen?" (GE 4:6), "Where is Abel your brother?" (GE 4:9), "What have you done?" (GE 4:10), "Why did Sarah laugh and say, 'Shall I indeed bear a child, now that I am old?'" (GE 18:13), "What is that in your hand?" (EX 4:2), or "Why do you cry to me?" (EX 14:15).

    I read Romans 9 and I don't see where it says that God knew in advance Pharaoh would never come to him and that he hardened Pharoah's heart to maximize his glory.

    And I don't see why being the greatest means you have to be worshiped as the greatest lest you somehow lose your status.

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  6. I've been reading the bible myself for two main reasons. 1) Better understanding of Christianity and Judaism (the most fascinating thing to me is discovering which pieces are actually from the bible and which things, like Purgatory, etc were later extrapolations). 2) better artistic and cultural understanding--so much of art and history has been influenced by it, that even if you think the stories are patently false, you can't ignore it's impact. My enjoyment of everything from Lost to Shakespeare has been heightened because I catch the allusions.

    As I've gone through, I've also been researching various aspects how the bible came to be, editorially and historically, and (is this a word?) translationally.

    On that note, here are a couple points that will help with a couple questions you raised:

    EX 22:16 (re: virgins): The Hebrew word used here is "betulah," which definitely means virgin. The word used in Isaiah (which is the primary prophesy of the virgin birth) is "almah" which is similar to the word "maiden" in that it can, but doesn't necessarily mean virgin. When Isaiah was translated into the Greek, it was (arguably mis-)translated into "parthenos", which is definitely virgin, and this Greek version is what the apostles read and knew.

    On "the Everlasting God": most likely that's just an epithet, like calling Krishna "Imperishable One" or Aeneas "Lord of Men".

    Also as to the name of god ("I am what/that I am" is either the source of or at the least a pun on Yahweh): "LORD" all caps or small caps is from the tetragrammatron YHWH. "God" usually comes from Elohim, which in Hebrew is technically plural, but usually interpreted as singular, kind of like the Royal "We".

    I look forward to reading more...

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  7. @Jason - I'm mostly reading it for the same reasons and I totally hear you on the Lost thing. I've read a bit of Shakespeare before but without any serious knowledge of the Bible. However, I'm taking a class on Shakespeare next semester so it'll be interesting to see how this affects my perceptions of it.
    And thanks for the information. If I had the time to do a lot of secondary research on this I would, and sometimes I do, but I'm also interested in reading this and commenting on it from a relatively average man's viewpoint. Still, I really encourage people to post this type of information so thanks again!

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